What Delights Them?

by Sheila on April 1, 2013

When I think of my nieces – Raisha, Rosie, Molly and Jilly, I feel utter delight. It is even more delightful hanging out with them!

Showing her guns when she was little! Showing her guns when she was little!

When I got to know them (and from the minute they existed in this world), I loved them.  What I was completely unprepared for was the idea that they would love me.

It feels natural to want to guide and teach a child. But it seems for me that what I want most is to delight them. It is/will be in the delighting of them, that I will “show” them things of  love in a world that may often be cruel to them down the line (and even now).

I’m not really sure what I want to say here, now. I do know that the act of love and delighting another person, brings me my love and delight.IMG_0721

Spending time with Molly and Jill Jill (my younger nieces – 7 & 5), I discovered that all of the intellectual conversations with adults (which I do love) cannot compare with just being with them. Being way silly! With Molly – bantering non-stop and laughing all the time while doing it! Watching Jilly draw endless piggies (because she loves them) and how she tells a story around them.  She always seems to relate any event to a lil piggy!

I started a list of delights specific for each one. I want to hold this idea always when interacting with them. I just recently thought I might begin this type of list with many others in my life who are significant. My question is: How might I delight them?261588_1791712312746_1237770697_31426541_5192092_n I began to understand that this might not always be so positive in nature, with respect to them feeling this in the moment. Some things, words, might come as a bit of a shock. But, I also knew this – the “delight” had to come quickly after this possible “affront” to them.

scanWhat do I mean by this?

I guess it is a bit of “delayed gratification.” For me and them.  Molly may be getting irritated or be struggling with something and my words not be exactly what she wants to hear while observing her behavior.  SSPX0195Yet, If I’m holding my desire to delight, she will quickly see something about herself if she hears my words. Our insights, when they come, bring such peace and acceptance. Insights do not come as readily for children as with adults – or wait…maybe they do? Children are no mired down with preconceived notions and beliefs as we are as adults. They do get it quickly! Sometimes, though, I think they just don’t quite understand it.

But/And, they shift. Watch a child and support and interact with them and you will see what I’m describing. Often it is through tears. When the tears subside though they are in a new space. And they get this “learning” in a deep, embodied way.cool

So, I guess when I think of delighting them it is most about holding this space for them to be who they are while I support and love them.n613650987_1690192_93scan0001

And, it is also giving them tons of stuff I know they will love!!!

My desire is to be what they need exactly when they need it. Tall order.


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